Anger and hatred are black holes that are forever consuming you. No maatter how hard you try to swim, no matter what strength you use, no matter how desperately you cry for someone to reach out, the tidal wave force will keep you in each time. You may think you are crying out for help but the unknowing eyes upon you only see the outward manifestation of your anger, the scene you have caused, they never see the truth behind your grey and sullen eyes. They never see the hurt that lies under such tempered and harsh words. It consumes you, who you are as a person and what you will do in the future. It is almost a never ending cycle, unless you find it somewhere in yourself to break that wall and just build a platform with the rubble with which to stand on. It's a lot of work, perhaps work I'm not willing to do at this point. I really don't know.