I have pushed you away, something that I swore I would never do again. I did this for myself. It is something that I have needed, something I am proud to say I did. You are not a part of me anymore. You are not a part of my life. I no longer feel like I am missing something I needed, I am no longer a person that is not whole; maybe without you, I can whole. I’m done talking about you. I’m done trying to be something that I am not for you, done trying to force myself upon someone that does not want me.

All of that being said, I will still worry about you. I hope you are happy, even though it is hard to imagine you being happy. Sometimes I don’t want you to be happy, I want you to miss me. I now know that I can’t hope for that anymore. If I resent you and hate you, I ruin the love we once had and that is not something that I want to do. Although it did not last always n’ forever like we said, what we had was real and I do not regret it. I could not regret loving you if I tried. I regret how things ended and how we treated each other, but I will never regret loving you. I will never stop loving you, I just can’t have you in my life.

This is finally goodbye. This is bittersweet.