writing for hours

I may not be who I want to be but I am someone you can see, I am someone living in this fictional reality. These roads are paved with ink that disappears, you’ll never know where you’re going until someone surrounding you interferes.I might’ve been something different, but I ended up being the same thing I have always been. There’s not a moment I didn’t think I’d end up famous. I don’t want to breathe. It seems like you’re not even here.You’re one of those people that they worry about, you’re the Kurt Cobain of today. No wonder he’s your idol, when you’re so alike. I just sit here runningmy hands throughmy hair, there’s nothong I can do but stare. I can’t breathe, it seems like you’re not even here.Forget the things I said I meant, I never meant to hurt you.I never wanted to lose you, you’re slipping right through.The cracks are pulling you under, the world is taking a way my very own 8th world wonder. Please stop letting the smoke fill your lungs, I’m so scared that it won’t come back up.I keep praying for a change, just hoping in vain. There’s nothing left of you, there’s nothing left of me.Everyone has to agree. We’re not the people that we used to be. There are some words that we said. We’re just hanging by a thread.Are you going crazy? No, just a misanthropist.I guess you couldn’t resist, couldn’t stay away from becoming everyone else.I miss the boy I knew, the man he could’ve been.He’s still somewhere inside of you, still perfection within.The drugs ruined it all, I can’t believe I expected you to save me from this fall. You’re the downward spiral keeping me in this bed.I’m just like my mother. All I can hear is you not caring, those words in my head. I’m stuck in the past, at a time when you loved me. I’m stuck at a time when there wasn’t so much apathy. There’s so much carelessness inside of me.I don’t mean in the good way, I don’t mean that I’m free.I mean that I’m chained to the ground with the wolves surrounding me.You told me that you wanted to spend the rest of your life by my side, now you say it’s all over. This is the day that I died.

~~~~~

“I’d rather sit here and wait for a message that won’t come then do the things that need to be done. I don’t want to get up, I guess you’ve won. Nothing seems to motivate me, nothing but you I guarantee.

Everyone keeps saying that everything will be alright, I guess I’m just not seeing the light. I guess I should say thank you to everyone who tries to make me okay, but I’m not thankful. It’s an emotion I just can’t convey.

I wait and write and waste the day, I always waited for the day you’d go astray. Falling in love changed me until the end of time, I’ll miss the moments that felt sublime.

Everyone keeps saying that everything will be alright, I guess I just won’t see the light. I guess I should say thank you to everyone who tries to make me okay, but I’m not thankful. I guess the love I felt, I just couldn’t convey.”