Happiness is no journey, happiness is no destination, happiness is a war that we are fighting every day. We are the soldiers of this ongoing trend, this battle that never ceases. To accept happiness, to believe in it’s true existence is to allow yourself to feel the sadness and regret that is the primary symptom of this so-called happiness. In the dictionary, they description for this word (and it is a word, just a word) is, “good fortune; pleasure; contentment; joy.” I have experienced all of these feelings and not without some sort of painful aftermath. Isn’t it funny though that all of these words having different meanings? Isn’t it funny also that contentment is just the stating of being eased of mind? All of these definitons make up this word, which as I said is just a word, which is a noun that we are all searching for. We are searching for a word, defined by people we do not know because as people we have assumed that we can not live without having or being this. Because other people want this, we want it and therefore go after it wholeheartedly. We do all we can for it, some people fall in to lives of drug addiction, some people fall in to lives that they thought would make them happy and live with regrets. We do not think of the repercussions because we are selfish, because we want what we want and we want it now. I don’t want to be happy anymore. I just want to be the person I am, a person defined by all sorts of words that people may or may not understand. I am a person that most people do not understand but some may. I’m just so tired of this chain reaction caused by this mother fucking happiness, I’m tired of being miserable because I was fucking happy.