I complain about these things, although I don’t consider them trivial. It is not infrequent that I realize how lucky I am, it is just not an every moment thing as it should be. There are times when I am ashamed of myself for not being there for everyone, not spending every waking moment of this life trying to make a difference as I have, since so early in life, longed to. It all began with you, taking care of you, loving you with everything I have but you ruined that for me in some ways. In others, you taught me so much more. I can forgive you but I can’t, it is such a hard thing. I’m sorry to all of you that I haven’t spent the right amount of time listening to, I’m sorry that I can’t do more. I could apologize for years and rant about how much I wish I could be there for you, how much I wish I could take every burden off of your backs and put them on my own. I mean that in all of it’s entirety too, some people don’t. I do. Please know that. I am just damaged.